Holy Crap.

So it took a skype conversation with my dad this morning for me to actually realize something, since I've been blinded by the filter of my frustration and the haze of asinine behaviour I've been living in for about two months now.

Tonight is my NYC debut, and the play I've written, Rewind, is opening in an Off-Off-Broadway theatre, fully produced and staged. It's more of a big deal than I thought.

Yeah, it's a junky little theatre on the edge of collapse. Yeah, it's as low budget as low budget comes. Yeah, it's been like herding cats trying to get anything done. Yeah, I've become one of the Saints of the Overworked and Unappreciated.

But when I sit and look at it for a moment, and realize where I am and what I'm doing, and that I can punch this into my resume, and I can call myself a playwright and a New York actress - it's almost completely unbelievable, but there it is. Black and white, in that program I spent 3 weeks making.

So, in the end, here I am. One step closer to living that dream that burns inside of me like a sickness, but the kind of sickness I have to suffer in order to live.

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So now that my awe has passed, I have a crapton to do today. I want to run and get the new issue of the NYU ID card, do my laundry, sort out the concessions bar issue we're currently having (out of pocket expenses, woo), make the tag for the headshot wall, set my costume clothes and props (I'm trying to figure out how I can swing it so I won't have to tote them back and forth anymore), and possibly grocery shop. Though, since my stomach refuses to accept most forms of food on show days, we'll see how much I can force down so I don't get all shaky onstage.

Also, if you've been following me for this long, thank you. If you're new, thank you. If you've ever read anything I've written here, if you accidentally found yourself on this blog, thank you. It's a journey, and you're incredibly kind and loving to have come along with me. I hope this inspires someone else the way I've been inspired. It's like sparks spitting out of my bones someday - I can never, ever stop.

Love to you, darling readers.